Chances
by k2912p
Summary: Set shortly after 14 X 12. How I would like to see the season finale.
1. chapter 1

**DISCLAIMER: I DO NOT OWN ANY OF GREY'S ANATOMY OR ANY OF THE CHARACTERS.** **A/N: I visualize this set a bit in the future after 14 X 12. How I would like to see the season finale.**

Meredith walked in through the ER doors, sunglasses still on, and her head down. She refrained from all eye contact and walked straight through, on her way to the attendings lounge on three.

She caught a few curious glances along the way, but nothing out of the ordinary. She hesitated, then took a deep breath and pushed open the door to the lounge and unpacked what she needed from her bag before stowing it in the cabinet.

A few other doctors were in the lounge, but were keeping to themselves. April came over and was babbling something, but Meredith wasn't really listening. She maintained her focus on organizing her items on the shelf in her closet. She put on her doctor's coat and was adjusting her stethoscope when Alex entered. They stared at each other for a moment, their gaze seeming to be fraught with tension.

"Hey." She said.

"Hey." He returned the greeting.

"Uh, How's Kimmie?" she asked, referring to Alex and Amelia's patient who had just undergone brain surgery.

"Uh, She's doing good," he stammered. "She wants to meet you."

April regarded her friends, noticing their unusually awkward interaction.

"Sure. I want to meet her, too."

"If you're free, I'll take you now."

Meredith nodded, and two friends left together, leaving April confused by the whole thing.

A few minutes later, the pair entered Kimmie's room. Amelia and Kimmie's mother were also in attendance.

"Kimmie, this is Dr. Grey," Alex said to the girl in the bed, her head wrapped in white gauze.

Meredith stepped forward, smiling. "It's nice to meet you, Kimmie," she said.

Kimmie smiled at the woman weakly. "You saved my life." She said.

Meredith took a moment to compose herself. "Actually, it was something my husband and I had worked on years ago. When Alex told me about you, I knew, I just knew that you were the reason we had developed this, the Shepard method." She looked over at Amelia, who had tears in her eyes.

Kimmie looked confused. "But Dr. Shepard…"

Amelia cleared her throat. "Was my brother."

Kimmie processed that. "Was?"

Meredith and Amelia regarded each other for a moment before Meredith spoke. "Yeah, he passed away. But he would be so happy to see that even now he was able to help you."

Mrs. Park, Kimmie's mother, stood and walked over to Meredith. "I will never forget him. Or any of you." She gave her a hug, which Meredith happily accepted.

Afterwards, she turned to Kimmie. "Dr. Karev tells me you're going to go on to do great things. Let us know when you get to Broadway."

Kimmie smiled. "I will. Thank you Dr. Grey."

Feeling emotion threatening to overtake her, she turned and quickly left the room.

A short time later, Jo found Meredith in the radiology reading room. "Labs are back on Mrs. Perkins in 2202." She handed Meredith the tablet as she spoke.

Meredith reviewed the labs. "Okay, Wilson, what do you want to do?"

"Give her FFP and recheck the labs in an hour."

Meredith handed her back the tablet, never looking up at her.

Jo stood there for a moment, hesitating to ask her, but desperate for information. "Meredith? Can I ask you something?" She slid into the chair next to her as she spoke.

Meredith looked up at her, emotionless. "What is it?"

Jo was a little put off by her demeanor, but brushed it off. She had no reason to think her coldness had anything to do with her. "I hate to ask this, but have you noticed anything off with Alex? He didn't come home last night, and he's being very distant this morning."

"I don't think you should be talking to me about this. You should talk to Alex. I know he had that surgery last night, and they finished pretty late. He probably stayed here to make sure there were no complications."

Jo nodded understanding. "Yeah, Kimmie. I wonder how she's doing."

"Actually, I just saw her a little while ago. She's doing better than expected."

Jo was confused. "You saw her?"

"Yeah. Didn't Alex tell you? The idea for the surgery came from something Derek and I worked on years ago, called the Shepard method."

Jo's eyes widened. "No, he didn't. That's amazing."

Meredith's demeanor didn't change. She simply nodded. "You better go take care of Mrs. Perkins.

"Yeah, okay." Jo gave her one last look before leaving the room. She was again facing forward with a far away look in her eyes. She was not herself today.

Alex was lying on a cot in the on call room, trying to sleep, but failing miserably. He ran his hands over the stubble that had formed on his face. He was so lost in thought that he hadn't heard the door to the room open, so he was surprised when Jo climbed onto the cot next to him.

"Oh, hi." He said softly.

"Sorry, did I wake you?"

"Uh, no."

She seemed oblivious to his distress. "I heard about Kimmie. That's amazing!" she gushed.

"Yeah, she's a tough kid. She's got a long road ahead of her, but she's going to make it."

"Is that why you didn't come home last night?"

He turned to look at her briefly. "It was a long surgery. Sorry."

"It's fine. I just worried when I didn't hear from you and you didn't reply to my texts."

"Yeah, it was touch and go for a bit there. Sorry. I should have texted."

She relented. She didn't want to sound like a nag. "It's fine. I just missed you." She moved in to kiss him, but he stopped her.

"I'm sorry, but I really need to get a nap in if I'm going to make it through the rest if this day. See you at home later?"

"Sure." She was a little upset at his rejection, but it was understandable. "I''ll see you tonight." She gave him a peck on the cheek before leaving.

Some time later, Meredith was in her office, apparently researching something, when Alex entered, leaning casually against the doorway.

"Hey."

She looked up briefly before returning her attention to the the computer screen. "Hey."

"Mer, I need to talk."

"Okay. So talk."

He looked around at the crowded hallway just outside her office. "Not here."

She stopped what she was doing and looked up him, nodding somberly. "Yeah. Okay."

She stood, and they walked off together.

Jo, wearing a negligee, is alone in the loft, which is lit with a multitude of candles. She has made a lover's nest of sorts out of an array of blankets and pillows on the floor. A bottle of champagne is nestled in a nearby ice bucket. A little further away, a black ring box sits, unopened, on a side table.

Jo glances nervously at her phone and smoothes the material of the negligee.

Back at the hospital, Andrew Deluca opened the door to the supply closet. He grabbed some supplies before he noticed the room was already occupied by an amorous couple engaged in frenzied kissing. From his vantage point, he could see the back of the head of the man, and knew it was Alex. He was about to turn to leave, when the pair shifted, revealing the identity of the woman – Meredith Grey.

He stood in shocked silence for a moment, before shouting, "What the hell?"

The couple jumped, shocked at their assignation being discovered; more so by who discovered them.

Andrew fled from the room. Meredith put her hand to her mouth in shock, while Alex slammed his fist into to wall. "Damn it!"

 _Fade to black_

 _Grey's Anatomy comes up on the screen_

 _End of season_

 **A/N: I love Merlex, and have been looking for a way to get them together with the current S/L. I initially thought a one-shot, but I feel I owe it to you to show how I got here, so one or 2 more chapters to wrap it up. I wanted to present it the way I would expect Grey's to spring it on us.**

 **I'm not happy with the way they went about this, but it also serves to bring them full circle. Read and review!:)**

 _http/greysanatomy./wiki/The_Shepherd_Method_


	2. Chapter Two

Chapter Two

 **DISCLAIMER: I DO NOT OWN GREY'S ANATOMY OR ANY OF THE CHARACTERS. BELIEVE ME, I WISH I GOT PAID TO THINK ABOUT THESE PEOPLE ALL DAY!:)**

 **A/N: This is how I envision the start of Season 15. I don't like to write in flashback, but I want to present it as I would imagine we would see it on Greys. Thanks for all the positive reviews. I really had some qualms about writing this, but…I just couldn't help myself! Flashbacks will appear italicized.**

 _Meredith stood in the hallway gathering supplies off of a cart._

 _"Mer!"_

 _She had looked up as Alex charged towards her excitedly._

 _"It worked! It worked!" He had shouted._

 _She had dropped the supplies and had pulled him in to a hug, smiling widely. He had picked her up and spun her around._

 _"I could kiss you!" He had exclaimed, setting her down._

 _Her arms had still been looped behind his neck, and she had been looking into his eyes. The expression in both of their eyes softened and changed, her breathing had become rapid, and suddenly their mouths had been on each other's, his hands tangling in her hair, then dropped to her waist as he had lifted her. She wrapped her legs around him as they stumbled backwards into a convenient on call room, unable to stop the primal force that had overtaken them. She had pushed the door closed, not breaking from the kiss. He had made their way over to the bed, and lay her down gently, finally breaking from the kiss. They had gazed into each other's eyes for a moment, as if making sure the other was okay with what was happening. He had seemed to search her eyes for consent, and she had nodded, instantly resuming the passion between them. He had removed her scrub top, his mouth moving to her neck, kissing every inch of skin along the way, tasting her salty sweetness. He had trailed kisses down her body to her cleavage and she had arched her back as he had worked to remove her clothes, giving him access. He broke contact to stand and shed his top, and then was back on her, their mouths hungrily searching each other's._

They stood together in the supply closet, shell shocked.

"I have to tell her." He said, grimly.

She nodded, her hand still over her mouth in shock. She couldn't believe she had done this. She had never wanted to be the other woman, ever again, and here she was, with Alex? She had betrayed a woman she had considered a friend. How could she have done this? But Alex was…Alex. How could she not? They had not planned this, she tried to reason with herself, hating herself instantly for the thought. She had slept with her friend's boyfriend, her best friend. Her person.

He saw the look in her eyes, even as he fumbled to put himself back together. He righted himself and touched her cheek. "Are you okay?" he asked tenderly.

Despite feeling like the earth was falling from under her, she managed to nod. "Yeah. You need to get to her before Deluca."

He had started to leave, and she grabbed him, crashing her lips onto his. "Come back to me Alex. Don't do anything stupid."

He nodded, worry clouding his face. They were both clearly remembering his past with Deluca, where he had nearly killed him.

"I won't," he said. With one last look at her, her was gone.

She stood for a moment, before giving in to the shock and sliding down the wall to the ground.


	3. Chapter Three

Chapter Three

Jo sat in the loft, nervously waiting for Alex. He should be home any minute. Suddenly, there was a knock on the door. She jumped up, figuring he had left his keys. She opened the door to find Deluca.

"Andrew! What are you doing here?" She hastily grabbed a sweater off a nearby hook to cover herself.

He looked positively crestfallen. "Jo, I have something to tell you."

She was annoyed. "Now? I kind of have something planned here." She gestured to the layout in back of her.

He closed his eyes. That had just made it worse. "Trust me, you're going to want to hear this."

She opened the door and allowed him to come in. He stayed right inside the doorway, remembering too well his last visit to her apartment.

He struggled with how to begin. "I saw something that you need to know about."

"Andrew, Alex is due home any minute." She crossed her arms in front of her. She was getting nervous. Alex was due any minute, and she was talking to Deluca while wearing a negligee.

"I know. Jo, Alex is…"

"Alex is home. Hey Deluca." He nodded as he brushed past him, nervously.

He greeted Jo with a kiss on the cheek. "Hey, babe."

"Hi." Jo turned her attention back to Deluca. "Andrew says he has something to tell me."

Alex looked to him, pleading with his eyes not to say anything.

Deluca decided it wasn't worth his potential safety. "Forget it. It can wait."

Alex visibly relaxed. Jo shrugged. "Okay. See you tomorrow?"

"Yeah. Call me if you need anything."

She looked at him quizzically. "I'll be fine. Good night."

She closed the door, and turned to Alex. "That was weird. He comes all the way over to tell me something, then decided it could wait."

Alex shifted nervously. "Yeah, he's a weird guy. Jo -"

She took off her sweater, revealing the negligee. "I've been waiting for you. Come here." She pulled him down to the area she had set up.

"Jo, I need to talk to you."

She was oblivious. "Yeah, I have to talk to you first. Listen, I had lied to you about Paul. And in that, I hurt you. And I never wanted to hurt you."

He groaned. "Jo, stop."

She continued. "Alex, I'm in the same place you are. I'm ready. I'm ready to have everything you want."

He stood, putting his hands through his hair, pacing.

"Alex, I'm ready to marry you."

"Damn it, Jo! It's too late!" He shouted at her. "It's too late." He said, more quietly, with desperation.

"No, it's not, Alex. Why would you…" Her voice trailed off. "Unless…"

He looked at her, a look of absolute devastation on his face, shocked that he had committed this act against her. "I'm sorry, Jo. I never wanted to hurt you. I'm so, so sorry."

"You _cheated_ on me?" she hissed.

He crossed his arms in front of his chest, his head hung down low. He nodded.

"I need to hear you say it!" she spat.

"I'm sorry."

"Not that. Say _it_."

He took a deep breath. "I cheated on you."

She paced angrily. "When?"

Still keeping his head down, he answered quietly. "Yesterday. And today."

"Who is she?"

"It doesn't matter." He knew it would only hurt her worse to tell her this.

"You don't get to decide what matters! Who is she?" She demanded a second time.

He looked up at her, tears staining his cheeks. "Meredith." It came out as barely a whisper.

Her face went white, and she sank to her knees. He went to her, and the second he put his hands on her, she pushed him away, hard.

"Get out. Get out now. I don't want to see either of you ever again!"

"Jo-"

Hot tears streamed from her eyes. "How could you? How could _she_? I trusted you, both of you! Get out of here, Alex, before I hurt you."

"I'm sorry! I – we – never meant for this to happen!"

She closed the distance between them in a flash and slapped him hard across the face. He didn't flinch, just took it. He felt he deserved it.

"I warned you. Now get out!"

He grabbed his jacket and left the apartment.

Standing outside, he grabbed his phone and dialed. "Hey, Deluca. I told her. She's going to need a friend."

He disconnected, and wiped his face before leaving.


	4. Chances Chapter Four

Chapter Four

 **A/N: I appreciate all of the reviews, faves and follows. I just want to say that I am not happy with what they (Alex and Mer) are doing. I NEVER thought I would do this, especially since I've been Jo. Please do not take it personally.**

Meredith paced slowly in her bedroom, wringing her hands. She checked her watch, paced for another minute, and checked her watch again. It had been an hour since Alex went to find Jo.

She thought back to earlier tonight.

 _He had come to her, saying he needed to talk. He had led her down the hall and guided her into a seldom used supply closet._ _She had entered the room first and stood across from him, rigidly, with her arms crossed. Her heart beat thudded in her ears, and she struggled to regulate her breathing._

 _He shuffled his feet a bit, his hands in his pockets. His eyes were cast down to his shoes, and stayed there for a full thirty seconds before lifting them to meet her gaze. The tightness in his face softened somewhat as he spoke to her. "We need to talk about this."_

 _Her voice was tight and tremulous. "No, we don't. There's nothing to talk about."_

 _His jaw line tightened, and his forehead furrowed. He took a step forward. "I think there is."_

 _She looked away and shifted position slightly._

 _He took another small step forward. "I think there's a lot to talk about."_

 _She uncrossed her arms, allowing them to hang loosely at her sides. She slid her gaze down to the floor._

 _He finished closing the distance between them. He reached out and gently stroked her cheek with the back of his hand, relishing the feeling of her supple skin, before sliding it under her chin, raising it until her eyes met his._

 _She felt her breath catch in her throat at his touch. Her pulse quickened, and her eyes closed involuntarily against an unseen force as she breathed him in._

 _His hand slid behind her neck as he pulled her to him, his mouth drawn to the dewy sweetness of her lips. Her arms encircled his neck as they deepened the kiss, both taken over by the electricity that passed between them. Their passionate kiss had reached a frenzied state when they had been discovered by none other than Deluca._

And now she waited. She was to the point of panic when she heard the light knock on the door. Before she could answer, it creaked open.

"Mer?" his voice filtered softly into the room.

"Alex!" she met him halfway as he entered the room, and gasped when she saw his red, swollen cheek.

He brushed her hand away when she reached up to touch it. "It's fine." He set his jacket on the chair and went to work taking off his shoes. He looked up at her watchful gaze, one eyebrow raised in anticipation.

"Deluca was there, but he didn't tell her. I did. She slapped me. End of story."

She shifted position slightly, but otherwise her facial expression was unchanged. She believed there was more to the story.

He sighed, and finished taking off his shoes. He stood, and went to her. He reached out and reassuringly rubbed her upper arms while looking earnestly into her eyes. "She threw me out and I went for a drive. Can we talk now? Please?" His eyes searched hers, pleadingly.

She nodded, and they made their way to the side of the bed and sat next to each other.

He spoke first, staring straight ahead. "I drove around for most of the last hour trying to figure out how we got here, and I'm no closer to an answer than I was when I started. I try so hard to be the other guy" he turned to look at her, then continued, "the _good_ guy. And then something happens, and I'm back to being _this_ guy again. And every time I think I'm done with this guy, he shows back up. Before I met you, I never even thought the good guy was in there. _You_ are the one who saw him in me. And, you know, your voice is always in the back of my mind. When I'm faced with a choice, I try to hear that voice, your voice, tell me what to do. And last night…"

"I told you to do the wrong thing." she said, flatly.

He held her hands. "No, that's the thing. It didn't feel like the wrong thing. It felt like it should be this way, like it should have always been this way. I know we went about it the wrong way, and we both feel terrible about that."

She nodded in agreement.

"But I can't help but feel that this is where we were supposed to end up." He brushed a piece of hair from her eyes. "And I need to know how you feel. Because the one thing I know is that I need you. I cannot lose you, Mer. Because without you, he wins. The bad guy wins. Please tell me he isn't going to win."

She extracted her hands from his and leaned forward, resting her elbows on her knees, and resting her head in her hands. It was a lot of information to take in, and she needed a minute. She knew she couldn't lose him, either. She closed her eyes and swallowed hard before turning her head to face him. Her breathing was so heavy she was certain he could hear it, and her palms were sweating. When she spoke, her voice trembled ever so slightly with emotion. "He isn't going to win."

His shoulders visibly relaxed and he released a breath he hadn't realized he had been holding. A smile appeared on the corners of his mouth. She returned the smile, and rested her head on his shoulder.


	5. Chapter Five

Chapter Five

 **A/N: Thank you for the faves, follows and reviews. This story is challenging to me on several levels, and I truly appreciate you for sticking with me!**

They stayed like that for several minutes before he spoke. "Mer?"

"Hmm?"

"I need you to tell me how you feel."

She sat up and gave him a coy smile. "I think you know how I feel." She leaned in and pressed her lips to his for just a second before intensifying the kiss and running her hands in his hair.

His arm wrapped around her upper back, while his free hand tangled in her hair, then dropped to her shoulder as he gently pushed her away.

"Nice try."

"What?"

"Oh come on. You're trying to deflect with sex." He said on a laugh.

She scoffed. "I am not!"

He tilted his head and smiled his trademark smile.

She sighed, and sat back on the bed. "Maybe I am."

His forehead creased. "I know it's weird. It's weird for me, too." He touched his hand to his chest. "But we have to talk about it. I need to know where your head's at."

She blew out a sigh, and the line of her mouth tightened. "Honestly, my head's all over the place." She cast her eyes downward as she spoke quietly. "After the whole Derek and Addison thing and the panties on the bulletin board, I swore I would _never_ again be the other woman. But here I am." She spoke with a tightly controlled voice, but the disappointment she had in herself still emanated. She ran her hands in her hair. "I really feel terrible for hurting her. I _never_ planned on this happening. I didn't plan...but then last night," she stammered, blowing out a breath to regain her composure. Alex leaned forward, his jawline tightened, as he waited for her to continue.

"I just wasn't prepared for that. And it's not that I never thought about you like that…" She took a deep breath to steel her nerves.

"But last night," she looked deep into his eyes. "It was like all of the puzzle pieces finally fit." _I don't want to fall in love again. Not until it feels like family._ She had said those words to him before. And the thing was, Alex felt like family. If she said those words, would he still be there? It scared her so badly to think that she could lose him, but she knew she _had_ to tell him. She took a steadying breath, but her voice was tremulous when next she spoke. "I don't know how it happened, but last night when you looked at me before we..." her voice trailed off. She took her eyes off of his and cast them downward. Her mouth was suddenly dry, and she cleared her throat. When she resumed, she spoke very quietly. "It felt like family."

He sat frozen, absorbing her words. He remembered their conversation where she had told him she didn't want to fall in love again, _not until it feels like family._ His breath caught in his throat. He reached out and stroked her cheek, wiping the tear that had escaped from the corner of her eye. She raised her eyes to look at him. His face had softened, and she thought she saw his mouth turned up in the smallest of smiles. "It feels like family to me, too." He said, haltingly. "It's, uh, actually felt like family for a long time, for me."

Her eyebrows shot up to her hairline and her mouth opened in surprise.

He took her hands in his. "It, uh, happened after you were attacked." He watched her closely. They had never spoken about her attack before, aside from Alex's questioning if she was okay and her insistence that she was fine.

He played with her fingers as he spoke. "Mer, when I walked into that trauma room…." His voice cracked, despite trying to keep it steady. "I thought I was going to lose you. I knew in that moment _exactly_ what you meant to me. And the night you got your hearing back…"

"When you got in the bed with me?" she added, eager to hear more of his revelation.

"Yeah. When I climbed into the bed with you, Penny saw us. When she looked at me, I remember feeling so… _guilty._ Like what I was doing was wrong. And I realized that I only felt that way because I was having feelings towards you while I was with someone else, even though we weren't really together at the time."

Meredith sat there in stunned silence, struggling with where to begin. "Why didn't you ever _say_ something?" she asked, incredulously, looking into his eyes, searching him for answers.

"I was going to. The day I brought you home from the hospital. I had been rehearsing it to myself all day. I was going to tell you that sometimes it takes something bad to happen to make you see things for how they really are. Sometimes bad things happen to make you realize how important someone is to you. Sometimes the person that is most important to you has been by your side from the beginning."

She sat in silence, turning his words over in her head. After a few minutes, she spoke. "So…why didn't you say it"

"You spoke first. You told me to go home to Jo."

She sighed. "What is wrong with us? We're not honest with our feelings and we hurt Jo. Then we _are_ honest with our feelings, and we hurt Jo. How did this turn into such a mess?"

"Look, I regret how it happened. I feel awful for doing this to her. But we can't change the fact that it happened. We just have to decide what we're going to do from here."

She sighed deeply and flopped back on the bed, covering her eyes with her forearm. "I'm sorry, Alex."

His forehead creased in concern, and he leaned back on the bed, raising himself on his elbow to look at her. He reached over and stroked her hair. "Sorry for what? This isn't your fault, Mer."

She removed her arm and turned her head to look at him. "We're the bad guys now. At least, that's how they'll see us. It's probably going to get pretty bad for us."

He narrowed his eyes. "Screw 'em. It's our life. I don't care about them. I care about _you."_

She searched his eyes, looking for some indication that he wasn't being sincere, all the while knowing she wouldn't find any. She felt it was safe to divulge some more information to him.

"It wasn't just you," she began cryptically. "After my attack, I had feelings for you, too."

It was now his turn to be shocked, which was evidenced by his raised eyebrows.

She continued, knowing he had questions. "You were the first person I saw after…the first person I wanted to see. It had been…I don't know, a couple of weeks, and I realized that I was thinking about you constantly. The highlight of my day was when you were there." She stopped there, letting the words linger over them.

He took a minute to digest her words, then asked her the same question she had asked of him moments before. "Why didn't _you_ ever say anything?"

"At first, I told myself you loved Jo. I tried to make the feelings go away. I didn't want to ruin our friendship. So I told myself, you love Jo. But it didn't really work. Then I told myself it wouldn't be fair to you to saddle you with the responsibilities of the kids…."

"Mer, you know I love those kids."

She nodded. "Yeah. That's why that didn't work. Then I just tried to find distractions….like Riggs."

He chuckled. "I told you I never liked that guy."

She chuckled with him, but only for a moment, and then she grew quiet. "And that worked until it didn't. Do you remember when you first told me about wanting waffle Sundays?"

He tilted his head slightly, and his brow furrowed just a little. "Yeah."

"You said you wanted to do waffle Sundays like a family, for as long as we can. I thought, for a split second, that you wanted us to be together." She chuckled. "I almost told you then, but then you said it was…"

"Before I had to go away." He finished her sentence quietly, bemoaning his stupidity.

They lie together on the bed, both now staring up at the ceiling. He turned his head to look at her.

"Did they ever go away?"

She turned to meet his gaze. After a beat, she answered him. "The feelings?" She slowly shook her head, and quickly wiped away a tear. "No. Never."

His eyes softened, and he leaned in to her and caressed her face. "Neither did mine." He lowered his face to hers and pressed his lips lightly to hers.


End file.
